Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Losing someone you love.

Almost two months to the day I lost my mom after a lengthy illness. It is the first time in my life I have a lost a parent. The fact that mom was ill, I believed I was mentally prepared for her passing away. I was with her when she did pass away, and when confronted with the reality of her death, I was a wreck emotionally. Since then, I have days where I think I'm okay. Until out of nowhere I have a flood of emotions. When does this stop? Or, does it ever stop?

The worst is at night when I finally lay down to sleep and my mind is distracted by whatever had gone on throughout the day. This is when the images appear in my head of the pain and suffering she had endured and the look in her eyes during her darkest hours. They are haunting pictures I can't escape from my thoughts. Does this happen to anyone out there?

A good friend lost his father two weeks ago. He's from Toronto and I live in Winnipeg. At the funeral when we finally saw each other I could see in his eyes a reflection of my thoughts and pain. We both began to cry and hug each other at that precise moment. Perhaps there is no real answer when we lose someone we love and how we cope with our loss? This is my first blog, not sure how this will work from here? If people actually read this or respond to this message from my thoughts?